Wow, Who Taught These Kids???

Atleast once a day, my kids do something and I think, "Oh, man, Who taught you that?". Here are a few examples.

Finn LOVES spit. He blows it out all over his face, puts his hands in his mouth and slobbers like mad, you know, normal 7 month old tricks. But then he starts to rub his slobbery, wet fingers all over himself. He loves it. He sits there alone and rubs spit all over his face and just giggles.

Sunny has a song and dance for EVERYTHING she does. She is a ham. The best one though is when she is naked and getting in the tub or shower. She stands there naked and rubs her belly and rotates her naked little hips around and sings "My body, my body..." Over and over again. I did NOT teach her that. I Swear.

Calvin was singing the "ABC's" while he was playing today. (*Warning the following is rated PG for strong language*) He started strong, and then he got to... J-K-L-M-An-I-Have-Ta-P-To-Your-Ass-T-U-V...... Wha? (...Note to self, perhaps it is time for a new pre-school teacher...).

Tyler likes to stretch while he goes the bathroom. I think sometimes he forgets that he has a strong and steady stream coming out. I will be in the kitchen and I hear sudden splashes as he goes and I know it is hitting places besides the toilet. I walk in and say, "Tyler watch where your peeing, please" and he turns, his entire body, mid-stream, toward me and says "What Mom?". Uh, nevermind...All just part of his "La-Dee-Da" way of life.

Ethan. Man oh man. Sometimes I go into the bathroom and notice a little fingerprint on the wall. In pooh. I never thought I would say to my kids, "Don't wipe poop on my wall!!" One time Calvin was in the bathroom with Ethan (Ethan would DIE if he knew I was telling this), and they were giggling. Calvin was a year and a half, and Ethan was about 5. I told Calvin to come out and give his brother privacy. When he walked out he had "war paint" on his face. Done in POOH!!! If I was surprised about telling kids not to wipe poop on my wall, imagine my surprise when I had to say "We do not wipe poo on our brother!!!".

One time I was on the phone and I said, "Wow, What a Bitch", I thought Ethan was in his room, but my sweet little 3 year old Ethan looked up from behind the couch and said "Mom, where the Hell did you learn that?".

So sometimes, my kids do things and I just go, "Wow, who on earth taught you that?" and then I think, "Oh wait, I guess that is my job..." Blush. But, they teach me something everyday. Starting with today, when I tried to correct Calvin and his ABC's and he refused to believe that I knew the right words. I told them I learned it in school too, when I was little and he said "Mom, you are not little. And they probably changed it since your school anyways..." And today when I went to the bathroom, Sunny, in her sweetest voice said "Mommy, we don't go pee on the floor, okay Mommy?". Gosh, Thanks Sunny. To think I had been doing it wrong all these years.... I love being a Mom. Especially to 5 kids who seem to know so much more than I do! Phew, what would life have been if no one taught me how to apply war paint properly, you know, the necessities of life.